Men, ya know you're out of shape when ...

1. you need a proctologist to find your abs.

2. your spouse replaced the see through shower curtain, with some patterned one.

3. your six pack is now a keg

4. you've switched your digital scale from pounds to kilograms.

5. a family of squirrels has moved into your belly button.

6. your bosoms are bigger than your wife's.

7. your wife hits the ceiling when you sit on the water bed.

8. you need a ratchet strap for a belt.

9. you lost your car keys in a fold, somewhere on your body.

10. children mistake you for a jumpy castle.

11. your love handles are now elbow rests.